There is a disturbance in the force.

So, I've been trying to figure out what's up with me/you/the rest of the population this week, and I've come to the conclusion that it's me, but it's not my fault--kind of. This is a tad confusing I know, but bear with me for a paragraph or two.

So, on average, I think I spend about fifteen-twenty minutes laughing out of the week, and about four-five times that talking. I don't talk much, but I laugh a lot. BUT, this week, I feel that those numbers have dropped significantly. That's the only think I can think of. The only thing... I've tried everything else. Having the weird kind of unheard/made-up/childish superstition that I have (It's only one), I've done  a lot to try to fix this without actually having to put effort into this. So, I've thought of all the things I've been doing this week that I don't normally do, and I've come up with a list. I feel it kind of fits the theme of the new year with my resolutions and all. So, it's time for another Numbered List! All righty...

1) I've been wearing my grey bra rather than my green or blue one.
2) I've been combing my hair upside-down.
3) I've been using hemp lotion on my face.
4) I've been wearing clothes I bought after X-mas.
5) I've been sleeping with my vent above my bed closed*
6) I've been sleeping with shorts on.
7) There has been a purple wreath above my bed hanging on my wall somewhere.**
8) I've had a sinus infection.
9) The electrical tape on my headphones chord is coming off.


I think that's it. 
So, I'm going to try and change most of that, but I'm not sure any of it will work.
That's just one of the things I've always done. Like breathing or eating or being resentful towards the rest of mankind-- I just can't think of a time when I haven't done it.


Otherwise I'm going to have to put effort into in my problems to try and change them, and that's not fun. I'm too busy with other things.


Today I felt:
Eggplant


Tomorrow, I'm forecasting:
Grass
But we'll see...
I think I need the effort of me as well as the effort of everybody else to get there. I hope it's a good day.
I need one...


*I'm not sure if this counts. I can't remember how long ago I shut the vent, but I'm almost positive it was before Sunday...
** I changed this by moving it from above my bed to above my penis bear where I hang all my purses, but nothing happened, so now it's on the floor. Where it belongs!

When there is nothing left to burn...

You must set yourself on fire.

So it's the last few hours of being trapped inside my house.
My tan fortress of solitude.
Which is good and bad. While I was stuck in here, I made up a list of eight cons about living alone.
Do you want to hear it?
Well, I'm going to tell you anyway.

1) There is nobody around incase you fall or are grabbed by a grab-me-gotcha from under the couch or something.
2) It takes forever to get the bed warm when you're trying to fall asleep. I swear I lay there freezing for half an hour before the sheets start to warm up from my body heat.

3-8) It's pretty lonely. Even with a cat.

Speaking of lists, I've included that topic into one of resolutions for the new year. Which I've made into a nice little list for your convenience.

1) Stop eating bad things. And use chopsticks more often.
2) Get a job, damn it.
3) Coming Soon!
4) Don't get pregnant. Nobody wants that.
5) Make lists about everything again. I used to and I loved it; I don't know why I stopped...
6) Coming Soon!

So yes.
I think that seems pretty reasonable.
I don't know what to think about the future.
Except, what I know about it so far, I'm pretty unhappy with.
So, I hope once we get past about... early May, it will get a hell of a lot better than what I more or less know how it's going to be up until then.
Actually, I hope it's not at all what I expect, and it's a lot better.
But whatever.

Bleh... I want to go back in time.
I like it there better because I already know what's going to happen and it's fun.
None of this "responsibility" shit.

Today I felt:
This colour.

Numbered Lists.

Things bad with my life right now:

1. I look like a lesbian from 1996.
2. I've recently lost my sense of humour until further notice for reasons unbeknownst to me.
3. I'm still invisible and/or just not worth paying attention to, to everybody around me.
4. I'm tired and uninterested with life.
5. I'm cold.
6. I can't find the remote to my telly, and you can't change the channel otherwise.
7. I need to do laundry, but I'm never home when the washer is empty.

Things not-so-bad with my life right now.

1. I recently finished a hat I can't ever wear because everybody is a fuck nugget.
2. There are some hockey games tomorrow night I get to go to, and pretend to be happy at.
3. I can wear my hat to hockey.
4. I still have one friend from Saint Hell-hole that talks to me when she has time.
5. Breanna has fleas. (that one makes me laugh)